Bashful Heart
Author: admin
public speaking fear?
i was voted the most bashful superlative for my school. i don’t think i am too bashful but apparently i am. i am terrified of speaking/reading in front of a class. i get nervous and my heart beats really fast. i know people can tell i’m nervous because i stuttered and the way i sound when i do it. any help to get over this?
First, realize that fear of public speaking is the MOST COMMON fear there is; nearly everyone has it to some degree. Thus, everyone understands it (if anything, they think they’d be a complete basket-case, and wonder how you manage at all).
Second, most of the time your audience doesn’t notice. They’re at a distance, and are focusing on what you’re saying. (I remember in college, friends would tell me after class how nervous they’d been; I was surprisded, because I hadn’t noticed, but they seemed to think it was glaringly obvious.)
Finally, it gets better over time; and there are things you can do in the meantime.
Be prepared. Know what you’re going to say. Have a cheat sheet of just the few key phrases of your basic points, so if you go blank, you can glance down and pick up where you went blank.
If possible, go to the space ahead of time, so you have a clear sense of what it’s like. (Being thrown by unexpected surroundings can, uh, throw you off.) And get there early, so you can do whatever set up you need, test any equipment, etc.
If you find yourself stumbling, just keep going (or take a brief pause to collect and check your cheat sheet). People are attending to the point you’re making, and don’t care about little glitches.
In fact, if you’ve ever read transcripts, you’ll see how much of this happens all the time, even in ordinary conversation. People fumble, restart sentences, change syntax in mid-sentence — all without losing sense, or causing their audience problems.
While speaking, glance around at the audience, then focus for a time on one person who’s looking at you attentively. Talk to that person for a minute or so.
Then glance around again, and then pick another person to talk to.
Don’t focus on inattentive-looking people. They may actually be listening closely, but making notes, reflecting on what you’re saying, or just don’t LOOK as attentive as they actually ARE.
Even if they aren’t really listening, there’s nothing you can do. Don’t worry about them, talk to those who ARE listening.
If you do a big fumble, stop, smile. It’s even OK to make reference to nerves, or joke about it. Almost everyone will understand nervousness about public speaking. Then just get back to it, and move on.
Pay attention to other speakers, and to your and other’s reactions to them.
Notice that it’s even hard to notice or care much about little glitches. Notice that people don’t condemn someone who stumbles.
In addition to being well-prepped in your material and delivery, be physically well-prepped, too.
Get enough sleep every night, especially just before you have to talk.
Eat healthy food most of the time, not junk. Don’t skip meals before (but don’t eat a lot right before, either, as then your body is primarily concerned with digesting, and your brain isn’t first priority).
You want your brain to be fully functional while you talk, so the sleep and eating things are important. (Though it’s not always possible to do these things, still, don’t completely neglect that aspect.)
So, be prepared, physically and have all your materials together; scope the venue out ahead of time if possible.
Remember that mostly, people won’t notice. If they do, they understand.
Over time, you’ll get more and more comfortable.
Humor helps.
Do NOT follow the advice to try to pretend there’s no one there. You know there is, and any noise from them would remind you anyway, and completely throw you. Besides, it doesn’t really address the problem of becoming more comfortable.
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